My New Chicken Barn

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Bobby Pins & Bullets / Funny Farm Stuff / Uncategorized

The week of Valentine’s day Tom and I made a down payment on a fantastic little barn with the understanding that we would pay the second half once the owners helped us disassemble the barn, move it to our house, and reassemble it on our property.  A few weeks ago we completed the project and moved the chickens into their new mansion.  They are quite happy in their new home.

I put together a few pictures of the building process to share.

chicken barn 1

As you can see Hero was supervising from up on the hill.

chicken barn 2

The barn has hundred-year-old barn wood on the outside.

chicken barn 3

The nesting boxes you see in the back of the barn are from Tom’s great grandmother and grandfather’s ranch.  The roosting bars are made from saplings from our property.  Tom brilliantly installed them with hinges so they can be lifted up and hooked to the ceiling for easy cleaning underneath.  The poop hammock was my vision.  I saw a lady on Pinterest who had sewn one out of fabric, but then it needed to be cleaned regularly by shaking it off (which sounds too much like flying chicken poop to me) and brushing it with a broom (which sounded too much like smeared poop).  I came up with the idea of using cheap shower liners so they can be disposable and affordable.  Tom helped me put hooks into the roosting bars and the wall so I could attach it easily.

chicken barn 4

I had to decorate inside a bit to make sure it is fancy enough for my fancy hens.  I added a cute little chandelier and a pretty mirror for the girls.  I had the following message exchange with my mother-in-law.

Me: I did something in my chicken barn that may make you want to slap me.

MIL: Did you hang scarves?

Me: Just a small chandelier.

MIL: It is worse than scarves.

I had read that adding a mirror is good for chickens because it helps to entertain them and keep them from pecking at each other.  I was lucky enough to snap the above picture of miss Betty checking it out.

chicken barn 8

Next to the mirror I hung a little teacup for grit and oyster shells when the girls need them.

chicken barn 5

In this picture you can see the front porch and the gorgeous sliding barn door Tom installed for me.  You can also see a few of the chickens in the background in their chicken run, which is huge compared to their old one.

chicken barn 7

The goat pen also got expanded and they now have access to the front porch, which they are pretty tickled with.

chicken barn 6

To the left of the front door we branded both of our family brands.  -7K (pronounced bar seven k) and V.  Bar seven K is Tom’s family brand which has been used on many cows throughout the years.  V is the brand for Vollrath, which is my great grandparents brand from their ranch in Texas many years ago.

We even installed a goat scratching station for the little girls on their front porch.

chicken barn 9

But no, our animals aren’t spoiled.  The goats have been enjoying lounging on the front porch in the sun, although I haven’t been fast enough to capture any cute pictures.

I’m so thrilled with my chicken barn and all the sweat and hours of work Tom put into building it for me.  Our first Valentine’s day together I had worked a graveyard the whole night of the thirteenth into the morning of the fourteenth.  He had to teach all day on the fourteenth so at 6:30 AM we had a breakfast date that he made for me complete with flowers and balloons.  This year for Valentine’s day I got hours and hours of work to build me the best darn chicken barn around.  He’s the very best.

New POTS Research

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Big Medical Words / Uncategorized

Last week electrophysiologist.  This week neurologist.  Both relatively uneventful with the exception of some news from my neurologist.

He starts out appointments pretty much the same way each time.  He enters the room saying, “do you have POTS?”  When I answer that yes I do, he usually follows it up with “why do you have POTS?”  That is usually when I throw out some kind of sarcastic or smart ass answer.

He handed me a new study published in Neurology Today on April 5, 2018.  Essentially there is new evidence that POTS may be a possible autoimmune condition.  Patients with POTS have been found to have higher amounts of antiganglionic acetylcholine receptor antibodies.  I immediately asked him if we could remove mine.  Sadly, it doesn’t work like that.

Dr. Svetlana Blitshteyn (who is a pretty big deal in the POTS world) weighed in that “a better understanding of the etiology of POTS could lead to better treatment, which is badly needed.”

This may not be huge news, but it is proof that studies are ongoing and people are still trying to understand POTS better, which will eventually lead to hopefully quicker diagnosing and even more important, an effective treatment or maybe even a cure.

Cheer up, potsies.  There is hope!

 

Preview: Dancing with the Stars- Athletes

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Dancing with the Stars Recaps / Uncategorized

When I heard that DWTS (Dancing with the Stars) was going to run an athletes only season I was really excited.  I was far less excited to find out it is a mini season with only four weeks.  Although, it will be super competitive and move quickly so that does interest me a bit.

A few days ago the pros were announced and that doesn’t matter for me as long as I know that Sharna is one.  If you’re new to my blog, just know that I’m pro Sharna at all times and always vote for her.  She is my favorite and it’s not up for debate so don’t even try.  I mean, you can always start your own blog and write about whoever your fav pro is, but around here it’s Sharna.

The professional athletes were announced today and I’m here to tell you all about it.  This included some research as I’ve personally heard of only a few.  I went the extra mile and found a twitter excerpt from each celebrity to share.  You’re welcome.

Adam Rippon & Jenna

First of all, this is Jenna’s first time as a ‘pro’ so that is exciting and I’m confident she’ll do well.  Adam is a figure skater who recently helped his team to win bronze at the Olympics.  He’s won several individual championships along the way too.

dwts adam

Twitter Post March 30, 2018: My mom and I are filming together this morning and while she’s getting her makeup done I’ve heard her say “I just want a natural look” & quickly escalate to “can you make my eyes look bigger? you know how to do that right?” in case you were wondering where I get my dramatic flair

Arike Ogunbowale & Gleb

Arike is a junior at Notre Dame and plays women’s basketball.  Why they don’t have a fancy picture- I don’t know.

dwts arike

Twitter post today: To answer the question, YES OF COURSE I am coming back for my senior year at Notre Dame. Why would I not want to get a degree from the greatest University in the world 😄☘️ (& a chance to repeat 🏆)

Chris Mazdzer & Witney

He recently became the first American to win a medal in men’s single luge.  I’m excited to see if Witney can make him a dancer too.

dwts chris

Twitter post today: Breaking news announcement! I will be competing on Season 26 of Dancing with the Stars Athlete Edition with @witneycarson!!! Also news, I can’t dance… Good thing my partner is one of the best in the industry and is also fluent in sarcasm. Stay tuned for more! Like me tripping over my feet a lot over the next few weeks.

Jamie Anderson & Artem

Jamie has won 15 Xgames medals for snowboarding.  She recently won a gold medal in Slopestyle.

dwts jamie

Twitter Post January 16, 2018: You just gotta do what you can and let the universe take care of everything else🌞🌙👌🏼 milklife

Jennie Finch Daigle & Keo

I’m sorry to say that I can’t see her going super far only because Keo is almost always eliminated first or second, but hey, maybe this is his season.  Jennie won gold medal for softball in Athens in 2004.

dwts jennie

Twitter post today: Thank you! ❤️ grateful for the love & support! Im so thankful for the opportunities this game has provided & continues to provide. Young girls are growing up seeing their sport (female athletes) on TV & back in the , & pro.

Johnny Damon & Emma

Johnny played baseball and has World Series rings with both the Red Sox and Yankees.  Now he’s got one of the best teaching him dance.

dwts johnny

Twitter post today:  Yes It’s true, I’m teaching my dance partner @theemmaslater how to swing a bat and she’s gonna be showing me how to dance.

Kareem Abdul-Jabbar & Lindsay

Mr. Kareem Abdul-Jabbar is the NBA’s all time leading scorer, has 6 championships, and the NBA’s only six-time MVP.  He’s a legend.  I know this because I at least recognize his name.

dwts kareem

Twitter post today: Don’t know if you guys heard but it’s true… I will be Dancing with The Stars starting April 30th on ABC. I hope you will all support me as I take this journey.

Mirai Nagasu & Alan

Mirai recently helped her team to win bronze medal in figure skating at the Olympics.

dwts mirai

Twitter post March 31, 2018: Today I was recognized at the post office as the girl who bought out all of the global stamps.

Tonya Harding & Sasha

Tonya was the first woman to attempt and land the triple axel.  Oh, and there was that wee bit o controversy with the Nancy Kerrigan injury.  Recently a movie was made about her life.

dwts tonya

Twitter post January 22, 2018: Lights! Camera! I hurt myself brushing my teeth 😂

Josh Norman & Sharna

Josh is the highest paid NFL cornerback, who currently plays for the Washington Redskins.  Of course he has a foundation for academic enrichment opportunities for the youth from his hometown in South Carolina.

dwts josh

Twitter post April 7, 2018: Huge thank you to for being the title sponsor for my 6th annual celebrity basketball game!

(and a bunch of other stuff about his charity)

Ok, I’ll obviously be rooting for these two.  It’s a nobrainer.

I can’t help but notice that there is no hockey player represented, which is just a crying shame.  Who is going to be watching along with me?  I’ll do recaps each of the four weeks and keep y’all in the know with the facts and most importantly with my sarcastic comments.

Tune in, friends!

 

Goat Polio, Getaway & Grab Bag of Spring Pictures

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Bobby Pins & Bullets / Funny Farm Stuff / Smile Makers / Uncategorized

Tilly Girl

Tom and I were outside the other day working hard on another project around the farm (to be featured in a blog soon hopefully).  We let the goats out to graze and play while we were outside.  Miss Tilly was acting super weird.  Standing by herself and just staring off into the distance.  She didn’t graze with the other goats.  She was standing pressing her head against the house.  Poor little baby was clearly not doing well.  Off to an emergency vet visit we went.

Did you know a goat can get Polio?  It is not the same Polio that humans can have.  Goat polio is caused by a deficiency in thiamine and therefore shots of thiamine are prescribed as treatment.  Luckily we caught it quickly and were able to get her in to be checked out by the vet that day.  It can be fatal if not treated within 24 hours.  She is back to 100%, but we will of course be keeping an eye on our little girl.  Tilly was confused by her sudden roadtrip with mom and dad.

tilly car ride

Peek-a-boo.

The weirdest thing happened at the vet.  We walked miss Tilly inside and the receptionist asked us to ‘wait outside’.  Nonsense.  They acted like she was some sort of farm animal in their vet reception area.  Her little tip tip tipping around on the vet floor was adorable.  While waiting outside in the parking lot she was highly distracted because even though she was sick she was enthralled with a donkey who was in a pen across the lot.  Tom walked her over twice to talk to the donkey.  Such a funny little girl.

She was highly interested in our snack buying in town though.

tilly pizza

“Whatcha got there dad?”

Tipsy Idea

Tom and I were feeling stressed and after he had a drink or two he came up with a great idea that we should go have a spa day and spend the night at the resort afterwards.  He is simply brilliant.  I did wait until the next day to make sure he was serious before I booked.

Earlier this week we loaded up the essentials (pills, swim suits, mini bottles of alcohol- because it’s just the smart economical decision, wheelchair and oxygen) and headed off on our little mini vacation.

mini vacay

The spa was lovely.  Tom was not thrilled about the toe nail filing portion, but then he did just fine with the rest.  He was holding the mimosa pretty tightly during the nail filing which was pretty amusing.

mini vacay 2

I enjoyed a lovely massage after the pedicure.  We relaxed and gambled a bit into the evening.  I won a whopping $14 playing the slot machines.

In the morning we enjoyed breakfast in bed and on the way home we stopped to buy new flip flops to show off our pedicures.

mini vacay 3

It was a lovely little mini getaway.

Grab Bag of Spring Pictures

goat sweaters

My goat girls have been sporting their spring pastel sweaters… and it’s ADORABLE.  Sadly, little Maizy is not pregnant so we didn’t get any goat babies.  Dang it.  She will go back to breed again in May and hopefully she’ll get pregnant.

goat sweaters 2

My chicken girls are pretty happy about spring time.

egg bucket

I’m pretty excited about one of my newest pieces of décor on my hillside.

camping limit sign

This picture just makes me laugh from our outdoor work day.  How is it that men can somehow always find a way to keep beer cold no matter what?  Another use for the rain barrel I guess.

beer in the barrel

Finally, this springtime sunset the other night made it look like the hilltop was on fire.

fire sunset

I’m hoping to be able to share another fun farm project in the next few weeks hopefully!  In other news, it’s officially the most wonderful time of the year… playoff hockey!  Go Penguins!

I hope y’all are finding fun things to be smiling about.  I’ll write again soon.

Something out of Nothing

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Deep Thoughts About POTS / Hold My Gatorade and Watch This / Uncategorized

Tonight I thought I’d send out a little blog about making something out of nothing, hence the title.  I’m off to a great start.

Look, we’ve all been there; a day or two or eight late on grocery shopping.  In all honesty I haven’t been feeling up to going to town anyways.  My dizziness has been more than less, I’ve had pretty constant headaches, but worst of all my fatigue has been huge.  It could be weather changes, it could be stress, it could just be because I have POTS.  Either way, to put it into perspective, we are out of milk, peanut butter, and now bread.  I’m down to the last few scoops of coffee, so the time is nearing.

I’ve been playing a little game of make food out of ingredients I have on hand.  It’s kind of a fun game, all things considered.  When I was growing up, sometimes for dinner we would have what my mom called ‘well there’s’.  Because it went like this… “well, there’s tuna, mac and cheese, leftover spaghetti, salad, leftover hamburgers, fixins for nachos or quesadillas, or frozen pizza.”  It was generally done when the fridge needed leftovers cleaned out, or mom had too many appointments or worked too many hours in the day to also cook an entire meal.

Essentially, we’ve been having ‘Well There’s’ for a few days now.  I’m pretty proud of myself though.  I had two old bananas which became banana-oat muffins.  They were not light, fluffy or moist, because remember, no milk or cream.  I then proceeded to eat four muffins for breakfast/lunch that day.

Another day I made ziti pasta- ish.  No meat, but I had marinara which I mixed with cream cheese and macaroni noodles then baked with some shredded cheese on top.  I did manage to take chicken out the other day which then became chicken, rice and zucchini (because I had one sad little zucchini alone in the fridge veggie drawer).  The last of the salad veggies have been chopped and eaten already.

Today I made homemade pizza because I had flour, yeast, a jar of pizza sauce and mozzarella.  Yay, pizza.  It’s not amazing, but it is edible and the hard-as-a-rock-banana-oat-muffins are gone.

In the midst of running out of groceries, other things continue to replenish.  You see, my chickens are still laying eggs everyday, so eggs are plentiful.  My lettuce is growing like a weed in my Aerogarden on the counter.  I know this is a little cheesy and silly, but it is a good reminder that when you feel like resources within yourself are depleting, God is always providing in other ways.  Sometimes I feel like physically I’m losing it with leg pain, hip pain, headaches for days, weakness, fatigue and dizziness, but mentally I am still growing and making progress.  God is still using me.

lettuce

Some days I feel like I’m flourishing, doing great, helping others and being a productive member of society.  Some days I feel like God is using me to make something out of nothing.

Just my little Tuesday evening thoughts.

 

The Bachelor Arie: Finale, After the Final Rose

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Bachelor Recaps / Uncategorized

You don’t know what it’s like living on the West coast.  We have to avoid social media for three hours leading up to the Bachelor if we want to avoid spoilers.  Y’all should have to do it some time, East Coast.

Anywho, Chris Harrison promised us that tonight all of our questions will be answered.  I don’t know if that’s true though.  I have deep questions.  Why didn’t Becca stab him in the neck?  Has she since called Ross?  Where was security while he followed her around the tiny house?  Is Becca doing better?  Does she realize she is the true winner yet?

We start by watching a recap of what we watched 24 hours ago, in case we forgot.  Poor Becca had a camera man follow her around the airport and on her plane home.  Oh my gosh.  They film her walking up to her front door.  GO AWAY CAMERAS.  At least give her some Ben & Jerry’s and carry her suitcase.

The cameras jump over to Arie having a ‘panic attack’ outside of Lauren’s house.  Lauren’s house is her parent’s house.  Is she 25 and living with her parents?  He knocks on the door and she opens it and throws her arms around him.  She says she has a lot of questions to ask.  Does she though?  Lauren says it was really hard to lose him on the same day he got engaged to someone else… which has happened every single season of this show since forever.

She wants to know if he was sure he wanted to be with her on proposal day.  He says he thought he was making a safe decision for his future because she was so confident and Lauren waivered.  Lauren wants to know if he was faking it with Becca or trying or what.  He says he was trying, but he was open with her about his struggles.  Is he over Becca?  1000% he says.  Neat.  She says she forgives him and he kisses her and says he wants her back.  Awwwww? I don’t know.  It might be trickier to forgive him than she thinks, plus the people of the internet and the world might be mean and less than supportive.  Is she tough enough for this?

Back in the studio we have to watch and see the opinion of baby Bekah, Caroline, Tia, Seinne, and Kendall.  They think he is super manipulative.  Kendall says she saw more emotion when he was talking to Lauren than with Becca.  Chris asks their opinion of seeing the ‘raw/unedited’ footage.  Kendall says she liked seeing how tough and strong Becca was.  Tia was with Lauren when Arie reached out to her.

Chris asks where this is going and what do these girls think should happen.  Baby Bekah says she needs to get out of that situation ASAP.  Kendall hopes it works because she watched their relationship progress.  Tia says Becca is worried about Lauren and really concerned that she is not guarding her heart.  The girls remind us not to judge Lauren for taking him back; last she knew they were happy together and she hasn’t seen how he has treated Becca this whole time, etc.

So, don’t Becca shame.

Don’t Lauren shame.

Most importantly, don’t glam shame.

Image result for gif i'm pro glam

We welcome Becca into the studio.  She looks great.  ABC showing the break up clip last night was helpful in her closure.  She humbly admits that she did sign up for this show.  Becca told him if he needed closure that he should reach out to Lauren.

She said a week before the breakup he told her he had reached out to Lauren and that there were still feelings involved.  She didn’t know to what extent.  PS, I would NOT have been this chill.  She says if she’s not the one, she’s not the one and that’s ok.  Becca is STRONG.

Chris is delivering the good news that the drink fund that Bachelor nation has started for her is over $6000 now.  She said to donate it to a good cause like Stand up for Cancer.  Chris said they would match it. High five for charity.

It’s time to bring Arie out now.  Becca tells Chris let’s talk, get it over with, and move on.  Becca asks him when he knew he wanted to end things with her and go back to Lauren.  He says after talking to Lauren (read that, after he made sure Lauren would for sure take him back first).

Essentially, there was a wee bit o’ miscommunication.  Becca thought the phone call to Lauren was more to close a door than to try to open one.  Slight miscommunication.

Becca tells Arie that he robbed her of her first proposal and engagement because he jumped the gun.  He owns up to making the wrong decision by proposing.  The pressure of the Bachelor and the timeline made him do it.  He admits that isn’t an excuse, but he definitely messed up.  Becca accepts his apology and forgives him, like a grown up.  She gives him a little speech about making sure to respect Lauren and have her back and she truly wishes the two of them the best and she hopes Lauren is the one for him.  There was not one snide or bitchy comment.  I’m impressed and only slightly disappointed.

Now it’s time to hear what Jason Mesnick and Molly have to say.  Remember that one time Jason was Bachelor?  He picked Melissa then pulled a little switcheroo at After the Final Rose and picked Molly.  They are still happily married now.  Jason gives good advice that Arie should take Lauren and go somewhere far away without social media and get out of the limelight.  My friend points out they should probably not go to Minnesota though either.  Good point.

Jason also says that Arie really is a good guy.  He reminds us there is a lot of bad stuff in the world and this guy is just trying to figure his life out.  I can echo that thought.  I blog for fun and we watch to laugh and hang out together.  What happens after that is really all up to them.  No need for death threats, ya? That’s a bit much.

Chris asks Arie how he thinks that convo went with Becca.  He asks how the last 24 hours has been for Arie.  He says he didn’t watch last night and that he was with Lauren (having hotel sex).

Chris tells Lauren that a lot of people don’t like Arie.  She knows.  He asks her to say what she likes about him.  She is impressed with his humility, honesty, and bravery.  Chris asks Arie what he wants to say to the haters.  He says it doesn’t matter because he’s sitting next to Lauren and they have each other’s heart and are stronger because of this.

I’m fine with it because Becca is obviously the true winner in this here game.

What’s next for the lovebirds?  They are going on a little vacay out of the country then Lauren is moving to Arizona.

Arie stands her up and says a bunch of things about loving her and then proposes.  It is at least a different ring.  Both of their families are there.  Is it gonna be awkward that the whole family told him to pick Becca?  Who can know.

The Next Bachelorette

Drum roll….. the new Bachelorette is Becca! I do think it is going to be interesting at least.  Also, if Arie had ended up with Becca I absolutely don’t think Lauren would have been the Bachelorette ever.  It would have been so boring.

She says she is going to be the best damn bachelorette she can be.  All of the girls cry about what a great person Becca is.  SURPRISE! It’s starting right now.  It’s not that much of a surprise though because they did this last year, but everyone is really excited and acting like it’s brand new.

Lincoln is the first guy out.  He has an accent I’m not familiar with, but seems super kind and genuine… hopefully.  He ends his meeting by saying, “Airy is a wanker”.  So he has a good grasp of reality.

Chase is out next.  He is super nervous, but he hopes to be the open door since that last door closed.

Ryan comes out playing the banjo and singing about her.  he can’t wait to get to know her.

Darius seems like a sweet charmer.  He’s excited for this journey and thinks she is beautiful.

Blake walks a horse into the studio.  He says when you fall off the horse you gotta get back up again.  He wants to be the man who helps her get back up on the horse.  Then everyone sees her vagina when she gets on the horse in her gold gown.

Ok.  So Arie and Lauren are engaged.  Becca is over him and gets her own crop of men.  I’m going to bed, y’all.

 

 

 

The Bachelor Arie: Finale Part 1

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Bachelor Recaps / Uncategorized

Cusco, Peru.  Alpacas everywhere.  It’s the perfect place to be proposed to.  Becca is committed.  Nothing about her is a mystery.  Lauren is still reserved or possibly mute.  He’s been peeling back the layers all season.

It’s time to meet Arie’s family.  Lauren is first.  She’s nervous and quiet, but she is wearing a super cute slouchy sweater so I have a good feeling.  The whole family hasn’t been together since little brother’s wedding in Holland.  Every female in the family is blond; I’m already very worried for brunette Becca.

Lauren tells Arie’s dad she is worried that she will get engaged and it won’t work for the third time.

Arie chats with his brother and sister.  She’s wearing a unique cold shoulder and cold cleavage shirt.  Sis asks if they have spent all night talking ever.  Arie replies that it’s a good question, but doesn’t really answer the question.  After all, she has spoken more in this meeting the family than this whole season so far.

It’s Becca’s turn.  Arie’s brother points out that they are aware that ‘yesterday was yesterday and today is today.’  I think he pre-gamed with the wine.  Three minutes in the family has pointed out that she is more outgoing.  Mom has her reservations.  She really liked Lauren.  Essentially, can someone dye Becca’s hair blond, because I think that would magically provide a lot of clarity.  Mom says she would lean more toward… (a producer frantically waves a red flag behind the camera) well, she likes them both and sees it is a tough decision.

Dad takes the time to have a super awkward conversation with Becca.  He brings up Lauren multiple times and says he is fine either way.  Cool.  Becca regrets not bringing that silly joke novelty flask in the drawer at home.  Every single member of the family continues to bring up Lauren over and over.  Becca tells the camera that comparing her and Lauren is like comparing an apple to a starfish.  Was she friends with Lauren in the house?  Did they get along?  Does she feel threatened by her?  Do you think she will look good in their family photos?  Will their blonds clash?

Arie says “I love you so much.”  Becca says “ok.”  She wanders out into the alley to find an alpaca to drink with.

Family gathers around to tell him how much they all think Becca is best for him.  WHAT?!  I evidently read that wrong, but as my friend Michaela texted, Becca read that wrong too.

Arie tells them that at the end of the day he needs those final dates to get clarity.

We break to the studio to see Caroline’s opinion.  She says if the rumors are true, no.  What he did is unforgivable.  Ok, cool.  Can you cut back to the show so I can know what he did too?  Do I reeeeealllly care what her opinion is?

Final Lauren Date

They are hopping on a train to Machu Picchu.  Sadly not hopping a train James Bond style.  Meanwhile, they seem to chat and appear somewhat cute talking about if their dogs would get along.  It makes her seem somewhat more human that she has a dog.  They wander at Machu Picchu in the rain and cold.  They makeout against rock walls.  He falls more and more in love with her everyday.

He says he keeps talking himself out of falling for Lauren, but the more she opens up the more he loves her.  In the evening she tells him that she needs to reassure him about all that she loves about him since he has been so open with her.  What she likes about him is that he reassures her.  I’m too sober for this.

He’s so thankful that he gave her those two dates in a row and forced her to open up.  She talks about their undeniable connection and how she always knows what he is thinking.  I’ve not seen this connection.  He says if he had to propose this second it would be Lauren.

**cut to the studio so we can find out Seinne and Baby Bekah’s opinion.  It’s bla bla bla**

Final Becca Date

He never thought he would be at this point and not know.  He’s hoping by the end of tonight he will have clarity, so he is essentially hoping this goes awful.

They wander through a Peruvian market and laugh together at fun outfits.  They kiss.  They pet baby alpacas.  They seem happy together even though she is not blond.

They sit down for a final big conversation.  He seems super reserved and standoffish.  I’m nervous.

In the evening Becca lights candles in the hotel.  She can’t picture her future without him.  She is worried that he could potentially be in love with two women (spoiler alert.. we already know he is in love with both).  She asks him if he has reservations about anything.  He says yes but kind of mumbles and looks down.  She tells him she is very clearly confident in the two of them and their love.  Arie smiles and says nothing really helpful.

She gives him a scrapbook with a super sweet note that she is ready to do the damn thing with him.

**cut to the studio to Ben H. (who told both women he loved them) and Jason Mesnick (who invented pulling a Mesnick– he picked a girl and switched at the final rose and has been happily married ever since with kiddos)**

The Proposal Day

Fun fact: only the final two girls get free dresses at the end.  ABC only provides makeup and hair people for night one (when there are 25-30 women) and the final night (when there are two women).  The final two get the dresses too.  There has always been a nerdy insider secret that you can tell by the time of day when the girls are getting ready.  In theory the girl who is getting ready later in the day (closer to sunset) is usually the one who gets proposed to.  I think ABC has figured these things out though maybe.

“I’m usually a fairly decisive person.” Arie

Image result for you sit on a throne of lies gif

Lauren arrives first.  Damn.  Does this mean in the end he switches back to her after breaking up with her?  I don’t know what to hope.

He tells her it is not her fault.  She says she is really confused but she wishes him the best.  He walks her to the car.  She manages to ask him why he did that.  She says she still loves him.  He says he loves her too.

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Lauren feels betrayed.  She let her guard down (really?).

Chris Harrison wants us to know we are about to watch the first unedited scene in reality tv ever.  I think he might be reaching there a bit.  Really?  Real World on MTV never had an ‘unedited’ scene?  Psssh.

Becca has arrived.  Her dress is amazing.  I’m nervous though.  Is he going to pick her right now and then switch later and break her heart?  She starts by telling him all that she loves about him.  He tells her about how he loves her and gets down on one knee and proposes.  She takes the pretty ring and there is much kissing.

I’m nervous.  I feel like assassins are going to start shooting.  Flash back to Chris in the studio.  He tells us we are about to see the days following the proposal in Peru.  They seem cute and happy and then Arie is telling he camera that on these getaways he wonders what it would be like with Lauren.  He goes to bed and he thinks about Lauren.

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Arie says he is too concerned about what it would be with Lauren.  He is going to call off the engagement with Becca.  They are getting together in L.A. for a ‘happy couple weekend’.  The show always schedules several weekend get togethers in different locations after filming and before the show airs.

This weekend looks ROUGH.  I hope the special unedited version includes Becca stabbing him if he is going to break up with her.  Chris tells us this is unedited and filmed with multiple cameras.

Does Becca want this to be shown? Should I be watching this?

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She knows bad stuff is coming.  He says he’s been struggling and trying to sort his feelings.

She asks if he is F*ing kidding her.  She has not stabbed him yet and I’m super impressed/mad.  He tells her that he thought the heartbreak would go away and it never did.  He says it’s not fair to be “half in” with her.  Becca asks if she would be “half in” with Lauren.  He says no.

She has still not lit him on fire and I’m highly impressed.  Clearly a producer gave her a sedative beforehand and took away all weapons.

She says he’s been up front with her and told her that he still had feelings.  He says he wanted to talk to her before the After the Final Rose.  She says he shouldn’t have gotten down on one knee at all.  I tend to agree with her.  Also, we’ve yet to hear any sort of “I’m sorry” from him.

She finally says she hopes he finds what he is looking for and that it is clearly not her.  She says she is done and gets up to walk to the bedroom to pack.  He follows her and she makes it clear that she isn’t going to hug him goodbye.  Then he says, “do you want a few seconds to yourself or do you just want me to go?”  “I want you to go” she says.  So he stands there and stares at her for a while.

She is sobbing in the bathroom and Arie comes back inside to knock on the door to see if she is ok.  DUDE.  SHE TOLD YOU TO LEAVE.

She is wandering around the bathroom mirror maze and the airbnb and can’t get away from the camera crew.  I yell at the TV “Start pooping”.  They can’t film that.

She cries some more and finally manages to say that she has nothing to say.  She cries to herself “what did I do wrong?”.  He is eerily silent.

He chases her down the hallway again.  “Can we talk for a few minutes?”  “Don’t touch me.”  PUNCH HIM IN THE HEAD, I yell.

Chris Harrison says we’re not done yet.  Pass me a drink.

Arie wants her to sit down with him and talk.  She obliges and cries and says nothing.  He finally says it kills him to see her like this and he is so sorry.  She says she is actually in love with him and can’t imagine her life without him.  He says he is sorry two more times.

67 more hours pass by while we watch Arie sitting silently and Becca crying asking him to go.  This is why it’s important to edit maybe.  The cameraman is bored.  I’m bored.  Becca wants to scream and evidently go call Caroline.

Arie finally walks to the black SUV and it is locked, which is mildly amusing.

Becca takes the mic pack off and goes to the bathroom (to presumably finally fake poop at least so they can’t come in).

We cut to the studio and Becca is sitting on the couch across from Chris.  She looks great.  She says it is brutal watching that scene.  Chris ask how it is to watch that back.  Men.  She just answered that.

Well, that was a fun three minutes of Becca sitting on the couch. We’ll be back tomorrow to see Arie, Lauren, and Becca all on one stage.

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The Bachelor Arie: Fantasy Suites

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Bachelor Recaps / Uncategorized

We’re down to three, folks.  Welcome to Peru.

Kendall’s Date

First up, Kendall.  They explore some sand dunes and ride in a dune buggy.  They have what she described as a “sandpaper kiss”.  Awww?  They have a picnic in the sand and eat something that I can’t tell what is.  That night at a tiki hut they eat more things I can’t tell what are.  She says she has so many things to ask him and they have so much to talk about.  So they kiss.  Which, is not actually talking.

She opens the fantasy suite invitation card from C.H. (Chris Harrison, if you’re brand new to this game).  She says after their conversations today, which we evidently didn’t see, that yes she would like to take the invitation and forgo her individual suite.

In the morning she says she feels good telling him that she is falling in love with him.

Lauren’s Date

They jump in a private plane and fly off to see the Nazca lines.  Arie thinks she might be putting a wall up.  It’s been established that Lauren is ‘so in her head’.  There is a lot of silence for a final three date.

They chat in a café later about her thoughts about getting hurt.  She has considered saying she doesn’t know if she can do it anymore.  Arie is visibly scared.  There’s a lot of ‘I don’t know’ going on during this chat.

I am sure that Lauren has a personality, but I’ve yet to see it.  He must have seen it at some point right?

In the evening Lauren wears a gorgeous red dress and they sit down to fake dinner.  Arie says he can tell she had a weight on her shoulders today.  She is thankful that he has been so supportive to her this whole time.

Arie says he loves her and he doesn’t want to lose her.  She cries.  He says, “Don’t cry.  I love you.”

It’s time to read the fantasy suite date card and her response is “um, absolutely.” Which is a shockingly lengthy response for her.

In the morning Lauren is makeup-less.  He tells her he loves her 2300 times.

Becca’s Date

Jump and straddle on the beach and this date is officially starting!  Arie informs Becca that they are taking a catamaran sailing.  They laugh, giggle, and make out.  It’s snuggle and discussion time.  Becca asks about his hesitations.  He asks how she feels about a long distance relationship.

“I’m just so damn happy.” – Becca

In the evening they go to a tent filled with candles out on the sand dunes.  It’s sweet and romantic.  I might be crazy, but he seems a bit distant.  They talk about hometowns and she says the next day she was watching the clouds and suddenly it just clicked that she loves him.  He talks about how he was falling in love with her, but that now she is not falling anymore, he is.  He tells her he loves her.  She is thrilled.

Don’t get too excited Becca.  Everyone gets an “I love you”.

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He gets the fantasy suite card and she immediately accepts.  They wander to a nearby tent, which my aunt points out, doesn’t appear to have a bathroom.  In the morning they snuggle and kiss a bunch.  Then Becca says a fateful phrase, “nothing can get in the way.”

Enter Ross.

The camera shows a guy (Becca’s ex) talking about how he’s here to get his girl and that he wasn’t aware that this show ended in a proposal.  Not if he has anything to say ’bout it.  He shows up at Arie’s room to tell him that it’s his proposal to give Becca.  She’s the only thing that has been on his mind every day for the last year.  She’s the one for him.

They’ve been broken up for a year.  He didn’t approach her to propose until juuuuust now.  Arie asks him to respect their relationship moving forward if Becca says no.

Ross takes the cameras over to Becca’s room.  She looks surprised, but clearly not that surprised because she says a few minutes later that she knew he would do this.  They talk a bit.  Ross thought they both still had love in their hearts.  Evidently, no.  Poor Ross.  He’s tired from that long flight and then driving five hours.  He needs a nap.  He feels like a fool for coming all this way.  Becca is worried that this will give Arie doubts about their relationship.

Becca goes to visit Arie.  She fails to say things like she loves Arie and she has no interest in that other guy and she sent him right away.  He seems confused.  She’s worried their time is tainted now.

Rose Ceremony

It’s been a good week for Arie to get clarity.

“Kendall, can I talk to you?” – Arie

“This is an ongoing theme.” – Becca

“I’m going to throw up.” – Lauren

He tells Kendall that they just can’t get there and that they aren’t going to work.

He gives the two roses to the remaining two women, Lauren and Becca.  Next week, the girls meet his family.  Becca will talk and Lauren will be blonde and silent.  I can’t wait.

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Tuesday Things: The Twenty-Fifth Edition

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Tuesday Things

I haven’t whipped up an edition of Tuesday Things since September.  That’s crazy.  I blame The Bachelor and Dancing with the Stars. I am always focused on getting my recaps out on Tuesday.  So go yell at ABC.  It’s all their fault.

And… I realize I’m posting this on Wednesday, but I typed most of it yesterday.

What’s new?  What should I tell y’all about?

I’m a Nerd

Look. I know I’m a nerd about this, but it really makes me stupidly happy.  I got a new toothbrush after Christmas and it is so cool.  It sits in it’s little holder on the mirror, so it’s not on my counter.  In theory that is so you can have a clear counter, but I’m me so that’s not happening.  Anyways, it’s electric and every three months they automatically charge you $5 and send you a new head.  Maybe you can remember to change your toothbrush head every three months, but I’m lazy and forgetful I guess because I never do.  Also, it has a two minute timer like plenty of other electric toothbrushes out there, but this one is different.  It pulses every 30 seconds so that you do one quadrant of your mouth at a time.  Again, I know it’s stupid because you could set a timer or whatever, but this is fancy and I like it.  So now you know all about it.  Plus, mine is a cute rose gold color and I like that too.  Anyways, I don’t sell these or anything, but if you decide you need to switch up your routine, I can send you a referral code that gets each of us a free replacement head I think.  So $5 savings.

So there’s my cool product I’m liking right now.

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Olympics

The Olympics are upon us once again.  I haven’t watched much this year yet because my husband is a Debbie Downer and hates the Olympics.  He thinks they are all rigged and everyone is eventually found out to be doping, which is partially true I suppose.  Anyways, I was always excited to watch them as a little kid.  Growing up we spent plenty of time in Canada for hockey, which meant we had ample opportunity to watch curling too.  I saw this video the other day and it is currently my favorite video on the internet.

Are any of you watching the Bachelor Olympics?  I find it to be most entertaining.  It’s like the Bachelor PLUS people falling on the ice and snow.

I’m Just Saying This So Now It’s In Writing That I Said It

Ok. I haven’t been blogging a whole bunch lately and it’s because I’ve had my writing attention elsewhere.  I’ve started writing a book.  I’m no where near far enough to know what it will really look like.  I have given myself the year of 2018 to spend all year and see what I come up with.  Deep down I feel like you need to be someone special or have done something great to be able to write a book.  People who were lost in the wilderness and survived or had a fight for their life of some sort, not people like me.  However, enough people have told me that if I ever wrote a book they would read it.  One of my sweet chronic illness friends published a book about chronic illness when she was 19.  She told me that anyone who has a story to tell can write a book.  I’m working on fine tuning my story.

Other Bits

I didn’t end up making it to the retreat to speak because we had some family issues come up and it was better for me that I was not there.  I’m ok with it, but eagerly looking forward to the next one.  Plus, maybe by then I’ll have a table with my books for sale. HA. Kidding.

I did make it to the truffle class.  I’m most impressed with my finished product.  I don’t know if I could do it all by myself and what my kitchen would look like after.  I learned about luster dust.  I’m a fan.

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My POTS has been rough lately.  I don’t know if it was the ‘hey it’s 50 and sunny’ then a day later ‘it’s snowy and 15’ that flared it up a bunch or what, but my energy has been mostly gone and I’ve had plenty of parts of my autonomic nervous system acting up.

Now that’s it’s finally Wednesday night, I’ll go ahead and send out my Tuesday Things.

Stay smiling, friends!

 

The Bachelor Arie: Hometowns

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Bachelor Recaps / Uncategorized

“It’s been such an amazing journey so far.” – Arie

That’s double points because he included amazing and journey.  Drink up, friends!

Kendall’s Hometown- L.A.

Mount and straddle in the park then we’re off to a taxidermy shop, because when in L.A…

She shows him several terrifying pieces and explains how it’s her way to appreciate animals.  Then surprise… they are going to mount their own animals.  Rats.  They stuff things inside dead rat skin to make tiny rats that they then dress up. It’s just your typical serial killer hometown date.

Twin sis Kylie grills Arie.  She can tell from the energy that they are happy, but she also senses some space between them.  That space is fear of being stuffed, I believe.  Arie wants to know if she thinks her sister is ready for marriage.  She doesn’t know, but she knows she’s ready for real love.

Kylie sits Kendall down to tell her that she just doesn’t get the vibe that he’s her person.  Clearly she can tell by those three minutes they were all together.  She gives Kendall the advice to talk to Arie and tell him all the things that she is feeling.

Kendall’s dad has a dad talk with Arie.  He’s not about giving his blessing.  Kendall isn’t that girl.

** in the ending credits we see Arie dress up another rat as Krystal and put her on the limo and drive it off the table while yelling “Bye Krystal”.**

Tia’s Hometown- Weiner, AR

“I’m in Weiner.”- Arie

Tia tells Arie she wants to do something that is near and dear to his heart, just like the South is near and dear to her heart.  Taxidermy! JUST KIDDING. Racing cars at a cute little dirt track. He’s far happier with this than stuffing dead rats.

As they are approaching the house, the cameras inside catch dad saying he wished he was holding a shotgun and polishing it when he walked in.  Dad toasts to “Airy & Tia”, oh and they toast wieners, because when in Wiener…

Tia’s brother takes Arie aside to ask if he’s a playboy and a kissing bandit and how he can prove tonight that he’s not that guy.  They do a little meth together and bond… just kidding.  Brother Jason decides that he seems like a pretty cool and genuine guy.

Dad asks Tia about how much she likes him.  Dad gathers that she digs him.

“If you hurt her, I can find you on Google.” -Tia’s dad.  Somebody call Google, that ad writes itself.

Arie asks dad for his blessing if it ends up being them at the end and he defers to Tia’s judgement and since she digs him, he’s cool with it.

Becca’s Hometown- Minnesota

This date starts out with apple picking in the orchard.  Next they do the apple slingshot and hit a bullseye.  They finish it off with dipping caramel apples.  By now the cold has spread to their special places, so they roll out to meet the fam.

The family is sitting around talking about how much Becca won’t be saying things like “He’s the one. I wanna get married.”  She’s pragmatic.  She’s a Minnesota girl.  She’ll be cautiously optimistic at most.  Or so they think…

Uncle Gary is first to take Arie to talk.  Uncle Gary means business.  I think maybe uncle Gary has been drinking.  Uncle Gary asks if Becca wanted to go to church what would he do?  He says he would go to church.

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Becca chats with her mom.  She says it could come down to a proposal and engagement.  Would she say yes if he asked?  “No.”  Ok, cool. That’s cleared up.  But she loves her and trusts her.

Arie talks to Becca’s mom.  He talks all about how much he adores her and is falling for her.  She makes him very happy.  Arie asks mom for her blessing.  She says she would honor whatever her choice is.  Mom says she likes Arie and that he has done well with her weird family.

They snuggle on a bench together after family time, but they have a blanket at least.  Apparently you have to be in Minnesota to get a blanket.

Lauren Hometown- Virginia Beach

They meet at the beach and take a horseback ride to a lighthouse.  She gives him a heads up that her family is gonna be protective and skeptical.  He is clearly super nervous about meeting the family.

At dinner it’s tense and nervous.  Dad asks if he’s been around a military family before. No.  Dad asks if he golfs.  Also no.  Arie’s 0 for 2.  He steps out for a moment to vomit I think.  He is clearly stressed.  He says he is approaching Indy 500 nerves.

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Outside he and dad get to talking.  Dad flew tomcats and the super hornet.  Arie says he himself has flown a C130.  Arie talks about a goodwill tour he and other drivers did over in Iraq.  Dad is impressed.  Dad says, “if she likes you, then I like you.”

Arie tells Lauren’s mom that he is falling in love with Lauren.  “Really?” Mom is skeptical.  She is concerned that he is compartmentalizing these other relationships.  Mom is not a believer of this process.

Lauren talks to her mom.  “I feel like I’m falling in love with him.” “Really?”  Again, mom is shocked.  She hopes it is real and that is lasts forever.  She wants her to be happy.

Lauren and Arie chat on the front porch and debrief.  Then a quick makeout session by the black suv and away he goes.

PS– I read online that Lauren has been engaged twice and is 25.  Methinks the random guy who shows up for his ‘woman’ in the next few episodes at some point might be there for her.

Rose Ceremony

Arie shows up to say it’s been an incredible week.  He starts talking to the girls, then he needs a second.  He walks away.  He says this decision is incredibly hard.  So hard, that he needs to talk to Kendall.  The other three are going through every option of what is happening outside.  Arie asks Kendall if she can truly get there at the end of this.  Will she be able to be engaged?  She says a lot of random stuff, but throws in that she doesn’t think that at this exact second she can be engaged.  She cries a bit.  They talk some more then they walk back in.

Roses go to:

  • Becca
  • Lauren
  • Kendall

This sends Tia home.  Poor Tia.  Lots of tears.  She doesn’t know what she did wrong.  He says nothing.  I don’t think she did the best minding her business.  I don’t think she should have meddled about baby Bekah, but I doubt that is ultimately what sent her home.  I think he is probably just more in love with one of the other women.

BUT… do we think they are setting Tia up to be the next Bachelorette?  They got a good crying in the getaway car scene, and you know they love that.

Sunday night is Women Tell All and I’m excited.  I’m hoping Krystal will give us all a little speech about how we should be living our lives better.

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This from Baby Bekah:

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And the Lauren mystery is solved.

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