Dirty Thirty- Why God, Why?

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Deep Thoughts About POTS

I’m not in my twenties anymore.  I’m no longer a 20-something.  Those days are gone.  Now, I’m basically a grown up.

I guess my 29th year didn’t exactly go the way I would have planned it, but it was great in it’s own way.

I like to do a general recap of what’s happened in the last year, but I pretty much did that in this post already.  So, here are my general thoughts on being thirty with a chronic illness and on full disability.

I didn’t plan this, but a lot of the best and most fulfilling things in life are the unplanned things.

All the way through elementary school I wanted to be a wife and mom.  It infuriated every teacher along the way.  The number of teachers who reminded me that I could be an astronaut or a doctor was impressive.  I planned to marry my high school boyfriend as soon as possible and be a wife and mom.  Well that didn’t work out and oh boy am I thankful.

Next, I was working in the medical field and I loved my job.  I liked the hours and the work itself.  I had so many fun coworkers.  While working there, I went to college to get an Associate of Applied Sciences in that very field because I planned to make that my lifelong career.  With each passing day, my direct supervisor became more and more of a bully, so much so that I got to the point where I couldn’t stand the thought of working there anymore.  I was ready to apply for everything and anything.  I went to a few interviews in the medical field, but nothing really clicked or worked out. Desperation forced me to apply basically on a lark to be a 911 dispatcher. I had applied a few years earlier and never got called in for testing (probably because I was so young).

I went for testing and after sweating through the math portion of the written test, got invited back for the multitasking test.  It was like a video game to me.  I loved it and in no way thought it was difficult.  After sitting along in dispatch I got more and more intrigued.  Before I was half-way through training I was already in complete love with the career and knew I was made for it.  Thank God my previous boss had put me through hell.

I don’t know why this happened to me when it did, but I’m already slowly starting to see changes that could be the reason.  We don’t always know the answers immediately, but I know things are revealed in good time and I’m just along for the ride.

Yes, I was dreading it a bit, but truthfully I use oxygen and a wheelchair so I think I’ve swallowed my pride already.

Each year for my birthday my husband makes a birthday cake in whatever fancy design I want.  Last year I had requested a cake designed to look like pizza.  Unfortunately I had just gotten out of the hospital and it wasn’t feasible.  I present today’s pizza-cake.


He used fondant and a propane torch to create the crust.  The sauce is raspberry jam and cream cheese frosting.  Shredded almond bark was used as the cheese.  The olives are black crows sliced with holes cut out.  The pepperoni is made of fruit roll ups and gummy fruit slices were turned into peppers and pineapple.

Talk about creative and delicious!

Overall, it was a great day and I’m looking forward to this year and to see what it holds.  I’m thankful for the support I have from all of my family, friends, and each of you!



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